The Rocky Hogwarts Show
by Sevi Snape
Summary: Hogwarts does a show organised by the lovely Hermione and even teacher have to audition! Who will get the main part? hmmm let me think! please read you never know you may enjoy it


Disclaimer- I only own the idea I own neither the characters nor anything Harry potter linked, I don't own anything rocky horror linked either. Though if by some miracle JKR decides to sell me Snape then I would be more than happy to take him.  
  
The Rocky Hogwarts Show  
  
Harry, Ron and Hermione sat in the common room of Gryffindor tower. It was Christmas and the trio were in their last year of school. So far the year had been uneventful, this unnerved them slightly. They had always been used to having some sort of adventure in their way, this didn't seem normal to have nothing exciting now. "There must be something happening!" said Harry as he got up and walked round the room. The fact that he found the castle to be quiet and normal was almost scary.  
  
"Maybe something will happen later in the year." Said Ron lying full stretch across the rug in front of the fire. "I say as this is our last year we should do something fun. Leave the adventures behind us." Said Hermione trying o sound the voice of reason. "How about a show, I don't think I have ever heard of a play or talent show or something being performed at Hogwarts. I think we should do one!" she said brightly. Harry and Ron looked at her incredulously. "You want me to get up in front of the Slytherin and make a fool out of myself? Are you insane woman?" Ron almost shouted. "Oh Ron don't be silly! Nothing will happen, I'm sure even the professors will perform too!" with those words Hermione got up and walked to the portrait hole. "I'll go and speak to Professor Dumbledore right now." With that she was gone. Moments later the portrait swung open again and Neville walked in. he looked from Ron to Harry and back again in disbelief. "What?" asked Harry shortly, wondering if he had something stuck on his head. "Hermione. stupid idea. Slytherin." was all he managed. Ron heaved himself off the floor. "Yes Neville we know. We told her it was a stupid idea but you know Hermione. So you best get your tap shoes out or practise your singing. Neville went whiter and stared at Ron. "What are you going to do in the show? Ron shrugged offhandedly, "I'm not even gonna enter. She can't make me." Ginny, who was sitting near by said, "Oh yes she will Ron you know she will. You are her boyfriend and she expects you to join her." Now it was Ron's turn to go white. He knew that Ginny was right and that whatever Hermione decided that the school would do then he would have to be a part of it, whether he wanted to or not. Harry sat there contemplating what Hermione would do? A talent show? A play? A musical? And how where the parts to be distributed? "What you gonna do Harry?" Ron's voice burst in on his thoughts. "Erm I dunno yet let's see how it goes shall we?"  
  
  
  
Three days later preparations were well under way. They were also well under wraps. Hermione wouldn't give away anything about what she was doing.  
  
"I'm not telling you yet! You'll say no or do something silly so you don't have to audition!" she said in her 'I know something you don't' tone. "But hunny please! You know I love you right? Can't you tell me a little bit of it? Oh please?" but no matter how much Ron pleaded he couldn't get anything out of Hermione.  
  
About a week after Hermione's 'big idea' there seemed to be some sort of excitement around the castle. Ron and Harry were crossing the entrance hall on their way to the great hall for lunch when they saw a small crowd gathering by the school message board. "Probably Hogsmeade weekend," Ron shrugged as he and Harry walked over to the small ensemble. Ron, being the tallest looked over the heads of the other students. "Oh god I can't believe it!" Ron yelled. "What is it?" asked Harry worried? "You know what she is doing? That.that. that woman! She is doing the rocky horror show! I'm not doing that!" Ron yelled. Harry giggled imagining Ron as frank from the rocky horror show. "I think you'll look really good in heels Ron." He said trying to keep a straight face. "Very funny Harry! Just wait! She'll want you as rocky!" Ron laughed at the thought. "Well I'm not gonna try out|!" declared Harry. "Tough luck mate you have to, it says at the bottom auditions are mandatory for years 6 and 7 and only people 15 and over can watch the show." Ron said looking slightly worried, "I bet I'll have to wear something stupid! Corsets or heels and Harry I don't think I could live it down! The humiliation!" Harry felt just the same as Ron but he knew as well as Ron, that as Hermione's friends she would expect them to help her and perform, regardless of their pride. They also knew that she would expect the professors to perform too and that might take some of the humiliation away from it.  
  
Auditions were to take place that evening. Hermione had been avoiding them; she knew that they weren't best pleased with her choice of show and that they would have something to say about it. She had been hiding out in the library looking up director techniques and how to choose the best people for the parts. She had an idea of who she wanted to play who, but she would have to see the people act before she could make up her mind.  
  
All over the school you could feel the anticipation as the afternoon rolled on. In the Slytherin common room all the students from years 6 and 7 were either looking smug and confident or slightly worried of what they were going to have to do. In the Ravenclaw house they seemed pretty relaxed. They seemed to assume that none of them were any good at acting and would do far better in the audience and as technical assistants. Hufflepuff house decided to give it their all as they rarely had their time in the spotlight. They feared this time would be no different but at the very least they would get a small chorus part, better than nothing. The Gryffindors were sure that their house mate would try and get as many of them involved as possible, with or without consideration for their feeling. Some of them knew they had better act as badly as they could to avoid humiliation. Several seemed very excited though. Ron and Harry were, however not part of this small crowd. They both dreaded what Hermione had in mind for them; well rather Ron was Harry seemed to be warming to the idea of performing.  
  
That evening the students all assembled in the great hall, preparing dance routines, songs, speeches and generally warming up. One by one they were called into a small room just off the hall. They teachers were there too. It seemed that it was mandatory that they should audition too. Ron nudged Harry in the ribs and pointed to the far side of the hall. "Look!" He exclaimed. Harry followed in the direction that Ron was pointing and saw what had caused it. Snape was sat there scowling. "I would pay to see this show if Hermione makes him perform!" Ron laughed. "The old idiot had better get cast." Ron sat there for the rest of the time giggling to him, obviously imagining Snape having to perform in a corset or heels.  
  
Snape sat in the corner of the hall, glowering and thinking how this was going to affect him. He hated shows and he hated having to perform in them. These auditions were going to be a nightmare. Miss granger would surely pay for this. But how? Detention? No too simple. Loss of house points? Still too easy. Fail her next exam? No he would need good grounds for that. He resigned himself to the fact that he may have to just grin and bear it. Well ok not grin but bear it in any case. "Severus Snape!" called Professor McGonagall over all the din. "Its Professor Snape thank you." Snape growled. He almost glided across the room, no swam would be a better way to describe how the potions master moved across the floor. His cloaks billowed out behind him and he looked menacing, but for once no one cared they were al pre occupied.  
  
He entered the room. It was a bare room with no furniture of pictures except a desk and a chair, both of which were occupied by Hermione. Snape shot a deadly glare in her direction but then faltered because Hermione seemed to be in a daydream but staring at him the whole time that she was. It unnerved him slightly. "Erm miss granger can we get on with it?" he drawled as he watched her come down to earth with a bump. He distinctly thought that he heard her mumble something along the lines of 'oh yes Severus please get on with it grrrrr,' but he couldn't be sure. "Oh yes professor what are you going to do for your audition?" she said and again he heard her mumble something like 'take me hard against the wall?' but again it could have been his imagination.  
  
Outside several students were waiting for Snape to emerge. The room had been soundproofed so as to avoid embarrassment for many. They tried to hear as hard as they called what Snape was doing. But this was all to no avail. They only saw him about 10 minutes later emerging from the room looking slightly puzzled but still just the same as usual, unruffled and cold. Hermione however looked very ruffled and pink in the face, also her eyes had glazed over. 


End file.
